I DIDNT KNOW OK?
IM SORRY PLEASE FORGIVE ME
Mira R. has been pronounced dead on multiple occasions.
Oftentimes she was forgotten, almost avoiding notice of many.
■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■
On the 19th of December, 2008, Mira was remembered for the last time.
■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ !
James R, a sibling of Mira, was the last one to ever think about Mira.
■ ■ i ■ ■ ■ ■ !
No records of Mira has ever existed, and despite this being written, this will simply be forgotten on the wayside.
Don't you ever forget me.
Pay it no mind that this was written at all.
I never disappeared.
I never did, okay?
I know it seems like I did,
But it was for a cause.
The deal I made with the others was to never contact the outside world,
But, before I did, I sent James a single email, and he called me crazy.
I'm not, I swear to God.
And although I may have been alone to the outside world,
I found a place I belonged,
Finally.
These people I joined, we all mutually agreed to work towards a cause.
Our job was to observe the contours and track them, and to never create them.
And I was perfect for the job,
In my entire life, I have barely made a contour.
I was the person they were looking for.
And after what was probably over a year, I couldn't stand it anymore.
So,
Yesterday I sent an email out to James but all he did was block me.
Something is wrong,
Seriously wrong.
Something is preventing my contours from ever existing in the first place.
To the world, I am nothing.
And so,
Life went on.
Because in a narrative,
The story doesn't end on the last page,
Even if the characters do.
You really thought that the waves wouldn't continue to crash on even if you died?
Even if your death is the most important thing to happen to you,
To the world, your death means nothing.
At least your fate wasn't as miserable as them.
A PARADOX is nothing more than a MEANS to give no EXPLANATION
It is a MIX of TRUTH and LIES that
NOT A SINGLE SOUL can
DECIPHER
You can make a CODE
With no MEANS of DECRIPTION
And yet you call it a CODE?
When you EXPLAIN something as UNEXPLAINABLE
Aren't you just making an EXUSE?
YOU are NOTHING AT ALL
Because YOU
DARESAY
THAT
YOU
UNDERSTAND
A
THING
The man finally looks up from his thoughts to see the woman. To him, she is beautiful. Yet he doesn't feel a thing, as he doesn't believe in feeling. He thinks, she must not be lonely. And he doesn't realize he's wrong.
The woman takes a closer look at the man, and her fleeting heart can't take it. She hates herself. How could it be? She thinks, if only I could talk to this man, or even just someone.
The man agrees in symptom. He doesn't feel it but his heart yells and screams. The man is lonely, and it's only a small barrier that prevents his ache from ending.
The woman says, "Hey…" and trails off. Her mind is running endlessly with inner monologue. She doesn't have self confidence.
The man responds, "Yes?" He is still refusing to feel his hurt. The man averts his eyes for a mere moment.
The woman is gone.
And so is he.
I KNOW I MADE A MISTAKE
WHY MUST YOU DO THIS TO ME
PLEASE FORGIVE ME
I KNOW IT WAS STUPID TO BELIEVE HIM
THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS
PUT ME OUT OF MY MISERY
One friend is alone, on the ground. His knees are filled with gravel, and his ears sting from the buzzing. He stands up, to find himself in what we call the Backrooms. To him, however, he thinks it's some kind of prank. "Guys?" He calls out, "This isn't funny," soon he screams enough to break his vocal chords "help!"
But nobody came.
The one friend continues to wander the endless rooms, light buzzing overhead.
You die two times,
The first when your heart stops and your brain no longer can function,
The second when the last person ever remembers you.
Pray to God that it happens in that order.
We don't have a name, as it would go against our cause to have one.
If you want to call us something, don't.
If you're reading this, forget it.
And to whom it may concern, we have found a stray contour. We have enlisted our best to find its source. This stray contour was discovered while going through the 19th's datum, and it's lead us quite far. This stray contour goes both forward and backward through time from the 19th, and it hasn't been abstracted.
Most of the data from the intersection between Base Omega's and the 19th's contours have been abstracted beyond reason. The catastrophe is a nexus, and it seems most of the residents of Base Omega has been abstracted, leaving one large contour that simple represents "the residents". One stray thread leads us away from the nexus, however.
We hope that our best will find the producer of this stray contour, and track it down. If there's anything our best can do, it's to never have been at all.
Don't look for us, we don't exist.
- ■
AFTER ALL THESE YEARS
IM USED TO YOU NOT LOOKING AT ME
AFTER WHAT HAPPENED
I HAD MY SECOND DEATH
I COULD SCREAM IN YOUR FACE
AND YOUD NEVER HEAR
AND APPARENTLY IM THE LUCKY ONE?
I WONT BELIEVE IT
I CANT
WHY CANT I EXIST?
I SCREAM,
AND THEN SHE LOOKED AT ME
I turn to look at something, I swear I heard a sound. I'm getting closer, aren't I? When will I find the poor soul that shares my fate? I whip my head again as I hear a scream. A black splotch scorches my vision, something is covering his face. And then it's quickly replaces by falsehoods. I know what is replaced isn't real because there is a man there, standing on a table in front of another.
I lock eyes with this man. He must be the producer of the stray contour. I start walking up to him, and he collapses in tears. "God thank God, you really see me, don't you?" He's sobbing.
Oh, the poor soul. "Yes," I say. Even though I don't know this man, I embrace him in a hug, "and I'm here to take you home."
The one friend made their way by happenstance to Base Alpha. The emotions he faced, the emotions he faced. At this base, he was given directions to Base Omega.
He didn't know what that base was, but of course he didn't know anything at all.
The one friend began to make their way, through a variety of dangers.
And yet before they made it,
They stopped.
Lucky, they weren't in Base Omega.
In Level 3, all of his memories of the directions, the person he talked to, and Base Omega suddenly and instantly was erased. How did he even get here? He couldn't give you an answer. And unluckily for him,
This one friend never made it out of that level.
At least he died, right?
To be, or not to be, that is the question.
For those in the world of paradoxes, they would say "yes".
Because when a contradiction can directly be true
THEN TWO PLUS TWO MAY AS WELL EQUAL FIVE
hey man
yes?
are you you?
wtf?
you questioning my identity?
chillax man
yes
ofc i am me
id say youre not
im not either
all we are is a biproduct
are you on something again?
ALL WE ARE IS A BIPRODUCT OF
ALL WEVE EXPERIENCED
AND WHEN MATHEMATICAL ABSURDITY
BECOMES THE TRUTH
THEN ARE WE A BIPRODUCT ANYMORE?
goddamnit man,
get a life
i did not wake up a 2am for this
ok peace :-)
2008/12/19
dawg, the wildest thing just happened to me, you wouldnt believe it
…
dude
bro
sir
BRO
DUDE
MR MANCHILD WHERE ARE YOU
WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU MAN
DAWG
ANSWER ME
PICK UP YOUR GODDAMN PHONE
2008/12/20
hey, who are you?
just checked my phone and saw you as a contact
sorry i kinda forgot
anyway
i gotta bounce
sorry for botherin ya
So what really did happen? You pulled the trigger, and the gunpowder in your bullet ignited. Rapidly, gas expanded shooting your bullet out directly at your grandfather's head. You could breath out these moments into years, if you tried enough.
Jokes on you, you will.
Once the bullet met your grandfather's skull, shattering bone and penetrating the brain, you though he'd instantly die. With time dilation, however, you see that it wasn't quite instant. In the snap of a finger, not instant but fast enough to be unable to comprehend, you killed your grandfather.
You cease to exist.
You never existed in the first place.
Your grandfather never existed, according to what they say.
You took down your causal chain, to your grandfather right in that moment.
Everything your grandfather has even done, leading up to the eventual creation of you stops to have ever had existed.
Good job, you created your first paradox.
ALL FOR NOTHING AT ALL
WITH NOTHING TO BE
NOTHING TO DO
NOTHING TO MEAN
I AM NOTHING
BUT NOT EVEN NOTHING CAN DESCRIBE IT ALL
She took me to a place with people, people that can see me. Words'll never be able to live up to what my heart faced. One could say it was everything that I've never been able to experience in the past years.
Amidst my pitiful sobbing, the woman that brought me here asks, "Mind if I ask for your name?" She looks at me, at me goddamnit! "Oh, I'm Mira. Don't feel bad if you forget it, I doubt you'll be able to remember."
I think I'm hyperventilating. "I'm - ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■" Harsh screeches ring like a siren that's broken beyond repair and everything terminates.
You really thought, didn't you?
That one day you might be seen,
That one day you might be known,
That one day you might be free.
Oh, how wrong you are.
i am a stray soul. i am the lucky one. i am nothing at all. but nothing is not me. i am the one who wanders. i am the one who screams. i am the one who nobody can hear. i am nobody but me. i am alone. but i stand in this vast universe. i am never ending.
SO WHY CANT YOU HEAR MY CALL?
Something just happened but I can't figure out what. There are things that don't make sense, things that don't follow causality. And that means a contour has gone through here. And worst of all it means something erased its existence. I begin to wildly search my surroundings, for some clue, anything.
On the ground I found a note, ripped on the ground and tarnished. Even though I know how this got here it wasn't here before. A fabricated memory.
It's all me
It's all me
It's all me
It's all me
It's all me
It's all me, don't you get it?
LISTEN TO ME
Paradoxes don't make sense, and if they did that would be a paradox itself. I think that whoever causes this torment, whoever is the cause of the suffering, and whoever is erasing my existence, well, it's me.
Think about it, it's the only thing that could be true.
Do you really think there is a God out there? or even some all-powerful being(s) that can control our mortal plane?
No,
There isn't,
There really isn't.
At least I don't think there can be, because what kind of God would put me through so much suffering? Why would God put them through worse?
I think our world follows rules. Ones that don't make sense, but nonetheless consistent. Paradoxes come at the end of those rules, when something breaks.
It's funny, if you think about it.
I caused this, really.
I could blame it on him but wouldn't that be lying to myself?
The paradox that caused the tragedy was caused by me.
And I'm the only survivor.
Cry, as the cinders flake from your hands.
Weep, as the truth fades to complete abstraction.
Sob, as the nexus rings true.
And die, as the never-ending tale makes its full circle.
As a man is writing an angry email, a colleague taps him on the shoulder. This colleague informs the man about a strange occurrence, and the man rises, relieved from the duty of scolding others. The colleague leads the man to a room.
This room is dark, yet well lit. The man can still see but no light enters his retinas. The colleague closes the door behind them, and hands the man a clipboard. The colleague says,
"Describe what you see."
Ash lines my fingertips, and burns are throbbing there. Apparently whoever keeps erasing these things are doing an increasingly sloppy job. Of course I can deduce what burned me. Something had to have been flammable, I must have been just holding something too. I know I was looking at it, and given the underlying context it was after searching for a stray contour. If it wasn't obvious, I don't just randomly stop to look at things.
So I must have been reading something. And whatever I was reading must have been important enough for someone to go out of their way to erase, albeit poorly. From there, there's nothing to go off of. Whatever I read is gone.
I'll have to continue searching for the stray contour.
Paradoxes are reality and no matter how hard he tries he'll never separate it.
Erasure is something that comes after a paradox.
Paradoxes cannot be, so they are erased.
Don't forge the story.
Don't you goddamn dare.
Don't think you can get away with abstracting the contours.
We will find them.
We will find the truth.
Because there is no perfect coverup.
Erasure is a perfect way to coverup a paradox.
There's a reason you don't think paradoxes are part of reality.
Because for all you know they aren't.
Don't give into the fallacy.